9 Relationship Tips to Help You Solve the Problem Without Couple Therapy
We’re revealing the secrets of marriage counselors; and saveing you from spending lots of money on your therapy bill.
Even though the honeymoon is over, there are ways to maintain good and fun times and fend off inevitable fights. We talked to relationship experts who are highly experienced in providing counseling services to married couples. We talk about the reasons that cause the most problems.
Clinical psychologist May Protect your identity, your goals, your dreams and your passions, says John Mayer. Even if you’re someone’s wife, you’re still yourself. Yes, you will continue your life with a companion (which is great); but if you forget who you are, this will eventually disturb you and will continue to cause you trouble later.
2-Establish a balance between your sexual life and your marriage
The author of ”Money,Sex,Kids: Stop Fighting about the Three Things That Can Ruin Your Marriage” Dr. Tina Tessina says ”Don’t expect the breathtaking moments you have at the beginning of the relationship to continue.” Instead, try to spend more time together, have sex to be happy.
He adds that the “drug” effect of falling in love will pass over time, but you can recreate it. Part of the excitement at the beginning of the relationship comes from the chemical reactions of the brain. Everything looks new. ” I recommend my clients to find new opportunities together.” While these innovations are; try new sex games or fun ways to make your relationship sensual to your bedroom, this good and sensual fun will contribute to your relationship.
“Today’s popular culture is cynical and cold. Expressing love is embarrassing and awkward, says Tessina. “But keeping love alive in the relationship is a must to be happy together. Stop reluctance and tell your loved one when you feel love. Express your gratitude verbally with flowers and candies, going out to dinner, hugging or kissing or anything. Even if you feel strange at first, you’ll enjoy the loving atmosphere that comes out of it, adds Tessina. There are reasons why greatfulness is so important for a happy relationship!
4-One Word: Reconciliation
“You’ll find that your partner has ideas about the things you find insignificant, says New York marriage and sex therapist. Dr. Jane Greer the author of ”What About Me?: Stop Selfishness from Ruining Your Relationship .” You will experience differences between you and your spouse. “These differences may be things like where to put the chairs when decorating the house or which color towels to use in the bathroom. After you get married, it’s becoming more and more important to harmonize your ideas with your partner’s ideas. ”
5-Know What’s Really Important to You
The main reason for the fights are the differences in sexual, economic or family needs, says Greer. “For example, one may want to spend more time with the family, but the other may not. You can avoid as much as possible. You can make clear discussions about what is important to you (visiting your family, saving for holidays, etc.). Be aware of what you want to compromise so your partner can respond to your needs and meet your needs, adds Greer.
But no matter what…
6-Know That There Will Be Fights
Don’t think you’ll fight less after you get married, says Schade. The issues a couple discusses before marriage will often appear there after marriage. Last.”
So we all have to go through these fights? Of course no. He was an assistant to a professor of clinical psychiatry and behavioral science at Northwestern University Feinberg School of Medicine. It’s necessary to accept that some marital problems will never be solved, says Dana Royce Bearger. Yes, you heard right, never! “But it is also necessary to understand that determination, goodwill and a habit of making a heart is important to protect a relationship from resentment and hostility.”
In other words, don’t go crazy when you fight (because fights are inevitable), but be fair and always remember that the person you’re fighting is the love of your life. They can’t be that bad!
7-See the Glass Half Full
“Happy, lasting marriages can maintain with the positive attitude towards their partner, says Bearger. They(People have a happy marriage) constantly observe their surroundings and spouses to find something to appreciate or respect. They also exhibit this attitude during discussion and disagreement. They are experts in extinguishing discussions without further exacerbating and becoming destructive.
8-Be Honest to Yourself
As a couple therapist, I realized that one of the signs of a long-term, healthy marriage is that spouses can see their individual contribution to problems with ongoing marriage, Bearger says. In other words, instead of just seeing your partner’s shortcomings, you should see your own flaws and think about how you can make your marriage more peaceful. “Some couples make a mistake and wait for their partner to change, Bearger adds. “But during this waiting period, the marriage may end because neither one of the partner has the intention to change.”
9-Be Willing to Do Something to Keep Your Relationship Fresh
You’ve probably heard this before because it’s definitely the right rule: You must be willing to strive for a good marriage, says Schade. Bu This is not something that happens spontaneously. People who have a good marriage are constantly striving to do so. ”
Even having little habits such as kissing your partner before leaving home shows that you care about the bond between you. And of course, it saves a lot of money for marriage therapists!