Last Updated on October 26, 2019 by Cindy Brown
Many schemes can determine one’s life in the most general sense. However, not all of these schemes are active at all times. One (several) schemes may be active, while the others may be inactive. Schema mode represents the person’s currently active schemes. With the change of the schema mode of the person, new schemes can occur.
There are basically 3 different sides / modes / ego within each person. These modes can be roughly thought of as child, parent and adult mode. We can categorize schema modes as follows:
I- Child Modes
Hurt child mode: This person is sad, unhappy, lost, neglected, insignificant, humiliated; briefly feels like a hurt child.
Angry child mode: The person himself, angry, frustrated, disappointed; it feels like a child whose emotional or physical needs are not met.
Impulsive / undisciplined child mode: This mode is like a child who is accustomed to getting what he wants instantly. He does not know how to control himself; do not tolerate waiting. Spoiled attitudes.
Happy child mode: The most basic feature of this person is that he / she perceives himself / herself as being happy with basic needs.
II- Parental Modes
Punitive parent mode: In this mode the person is extremely sensitive to the rules. The rule overrides the goal. The person thinks that those who do not obey the rules (including himself) should be punished.
Demanding parent mode: A person feels as if his or her parent is constantly asking for something challenging. The person should work hard, and do the best. It is wrong for a person to open up his emotions or to express himself.
III- Incompatible Coping Modes
Listening / surrender mode: It does not oppose unfair criticism and compelling demands. Even though it is difficult for him to do what is requested. He doesn’t say his own needs.
Vulnerable Child Mode: The individual refuses all kinds of help from people and turns in upon himself. The will not establish an emotional bond with people. He will not express his needs. He feels empty, messy, impersonal and so on.
Overcompensation Mode: It is characterized by disproportionate egotrip, arrogance, feeling superior to other people, pressure, orientation, status indulgence, and effort for attention-getting. All of these behaviors are developed to meet the unmet basic needs.
IV- Healthy Adult Mode
It is the healthy adult side of the personality. The individual is aware of himself, basic needs and his unhealthy modes. He tries to change his negative sides. He has a peaceful attitude for himself and others. He likes people and works and produces in a balanced way.
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